The Kings are riding high, and a three game win streak, as their sole opportunity for true national attention has arrived in Sacramento! Yes that's right, tonight's our nationally televised opportunity for the year as TNT comes to town to see our guys in grey go up against the uniquely screwy Br_ _klyn Nets*. That's right, the uber expensive squad of All-Stars has rolled into town with their three square** circus: Kevin Durant, Ben Sim-nope, Kyrie Irv-NOPE, coach Steve Na-oooope… Kevin Durant will be making his sole appearance this season, and will be looking to single handedly lead the Nets over a Kings squad trying desperately to establish themselves in the playoff hunt early in the season. Can the Kings keep the good vibes going or will a mysterious conspiracy of some of the league's most powerful individuals keep them from succeeding??
Let's talk Kings basketball!
*[All roundness removed from official Nets stuff until Kyrie Irving can figure out what the hell is going on]
*[Rings - also shady]
When: Tuesday, November 15th, 2022, 7:00 PM PT
Where: Golden 1 Center, Sacramento, CA
TV: TNT, NBC Sports California
Radio: Sactown Sports 1140
For Your Consideration
Made Your Bed-Stuy, Now Lay In It: The Nets are a bit of a mess. Yes we know the KD trade stuff, and the Ben Simmons trade stuff, and Steve Nash firing/Ime Udoka near hiring stuff, and the Kyrie Irving anti-vax, and the Kyrie flat earth stuff and the Kyrie anti-sem- THEY'RE A BIT OF A MESS, OKAY. But... all things considered, they aren't a terrible basketball team. Even with Simmons sidelined and Kyrie suspended, Kevin Durant plus just about any four NBA quality players could be competitive on a given night. Yes, the vibes are immaculate in Sacramento, but there can be no overlooking this team tonight.
For one, with all this turmoil, the Nets are a really decent defensive team - with a 12th ranked defensive rating, the Nets currently hold opponents to the 7th least points per contest. They're 11th in the league in steals, 1st overall in blocks and hold opponents to the lowest two point field goal percentage in the league. They've got the pieces necessary to stop a Kings squad still searching for their ultimate form. Now, on the other end of the coin, they're bottom 10 in fouls per game and give up the 4th best 3 point percentage in the league with opponents shooting a tick under 38% from deep against the Nets. If there's one thing I know about the Kings this season, it's that they've got shooters.
On offense the Nets look like a team that's in disarray, with a myriad of star drama, coaching drama, injuries etc. They've beaten teams like the Clippers, they've lost to teams like the Lakers without Lebron, they're just cobbling lineups together until someone can figure out what the hell is supposed to be happening. Their one constant, is first ballot Hall-of-Fame Twitter user and basketball star, Kevin Durant. Durant, at age 34, with an Achilles held together by twine dipped in pure vitriol, is averaging 30.6 points, 6.6 rebounds, 5.3 assists, 1.9 blocks, shooting 52.4% from the field and 35.8% from deep. There has never been someone who could completely cover Kevin Durant. That run doesn't stop tonight. If the Kings want that all effusive praise from Shaq, Charles Barkley and the rest of the TNT crew, they need to find a way to make others on the Nets beat them. Seth Curry, Cam Thomas, Joe Harris - the Nets have guys who can 1) get hot and 2) feel very Kings slayer-y, but none so more than The Slim Reaper himself. Get the ball out of his hands and force a guy like Royce O'Neale to shoot 17-18 times tonight.
The Kings feel like they're on the up-and-up and any win in front of a national audience will be a signature win for the season. If the Kings are going to have a coming out party this season, filled with national media hype and love, there couldn't be a better time to start than a victory against a premiere name in the NBA.
Prediction
Sabonis gets Nick Claxton into early foul trouble then goes absolutely bananas against the bench bigs from Br_ _klyn. There isn't a single person on the Nets that can keep up with De'Aaron Fox and he blows through Patty Mills for a massive 30+ points, 10+ assists game. Edmond Sumner is that random "oh this is the guy that kills us tonight" guy - goes for 16. The Beam Team cruises.
Kings: 127, Nets:111
This needed to be purple.
Beam Bros
Band(aid) of Brothers?
Band(aid) On the Run?
How many else to join to drink the bandaid koolaid
Fans are supporting Monk with bandaids on their faces.
I say every fan at the game should not SMILE, in solidarity with Keegan.
No one knows when Kyrie will play,
Or what in the world he might say.
He’s still out of action;
For the Nets a distraction.
Hope that helps the Kings blow them away!
Going with the haiku instead of limerick this time…
The Fox and the Ox
Greatest duo in the league
Go beat the Nets please
Kyrie likes to think he’s quite posh,
But his earth and Jew BS don’t wash.
Like how he conspired
to get his coach fired
‘cuz he though that his name was Steve Nosh.
There once was a girl from Nantucket,
errr,
sorry wrong website.
No-no! This is the right website. Go on…
…Fucket, we deserve this win!
Great read Will.
No, we don’t have an answer for KD, but nobody ever does. However, the Nets have no answers for Fox OR Sabonis.
I’m predicting a shootout, with some sloppy defense, but the Kings supporting cast will ultimately be the difference maker.
Where are my “trade Fox for Simmons!” people at?
Where are the “Players in their fifth year don’t make a leap” people at?
And I still stand by that because history is on my side. If Fox continues on this pace, then he bucks a well established trend and the Kings are all the better for it. I’ll be among the first to celebrate it, but I’m not ready to say he has 11 games into the season, just like I’m not ready to say that Simmons isn’t an All-NBA defensive player anymore.
I think your mistake was just the arbitrary ‘fifth-year’ demarcation. I was surprised the other day reading an article which reminded me that Fox is still just 24 years old (less than 1 year older than Davion). He won’t become a truly finished product for another 2-3 years.
Still, predicting the leap he made this season was hard for anybody. It just goes to show how much profound organizational incompetence can affect a young player’s basketball career.
He has some better pieces and a more cohesive system/coaching staff, which he has benefited from greatly. He also seems to have a different mindset this season. The talent was always there, now the other pieces are in place.
This is an excellent point. I don’t think we fully know yet if Fox has made a jump or if management has finally put him in a position to succeed with the proper surrounding pieces.
Agreed with this point. Hopeful that organizational incompetence is a thing of the past but fearful that it isn’t.
And I absolutely believe you have the intellectual honesty to celebrate it if it does happen, you won’t make any excuses for your thoughts and will gladly and freely admit that you were wrong this time. I think that shows character and accountability and it’s always fun to be wrong on something like this
Yup, and thanks.
They’re hanging out with the “eleven games does not a season make” people?
Pardon the analogy, but if one has not had sex in a while, it does not take much to get one to climax. Being a Kings fan is a lot like that.
I’m really enjoying Fox’s level of play. I will jump on his bandwagon come January, after he has sustained this level of play for half the season.
I’ve never tried analogy
It’s also relative .. for those us in our 50’s everything take longer.. but the analogy still works
I just wish there was a way to test that theory for myself.
OK, I’ll bite. He hasn’t make a leap. He’s just playing the way he’s always been capable of playing.
I was one of those guys last year, but that was when the Kings still had Hali and Fox was shooting sub 30% from three.
Rooting for the Kings and enjoying the team’s success?
And yes, I would have made that trade at the time, subject to the results of Simmons’ physical. Good thing that I’m not the GM. Too bad that the organization passed on Luka Doncic, whom I would have drafted. Lather, rinse, repeat.
If you keep picking at that, it will never heal. I’ve never understood the need to hindsight call out folks for their opinions, and I suppose that I never will. But if it will make you sleep better tonight, you have outed one person that liked the idea of trading Fox for Simmons last year, absent of any access to the medicals, of course. Huzzah!
Some people just haven’t yet figured out that we’re all wrong all the time.
I’m happily married so I am wrong 99 out of 100 times…I have figured it out
I think you may be overestimating the amount of times you’re right. Based on my years of marriage
100% Truth….
Thank God I don’t think I ever went there
Looks like Simmons is playing
Crap! What are we gonna do when KD and Ben combine for 40 pts??? (KD 36, Ben 4)
No way Simmons gets that many on zero shots. Foul the shit out of him.
Yup. Put him on the line and give him all the jumpers outside of 10 feet that he wants. Make Simmons be the guy that beats you, because you aren’t stopping Durant from getting 30+ points
Good strategy, Simmons can’t make a free throw, all while being paid $35 million a year.
Well, the team is like 1-5 when I have watched this year. The lone win against the Heat. Dare I watch tonight???
Watching is over-rated Hobby.
Would you like the password to my Amazon prime video account? You can watch Maverick and heck even rent a few movies if you want. Plus I hear the broadcast will be horrible tonight so definitely definitely I wouldn’t watch at least until the games over
Kings will win tonight!
Fox is playing like a hall of famer and he’ll run right past that weak Nets defense!
Sabonis is the best big man in the west!
Malik and the band-aid squad will propel the bench to great things!
Huerter will continue to knock down threes at a furious pace and score 30 points tonight!
Metu will slam home no less than five dunks!
Mike Brown is coaching stellar basketball right now! Kings are a top offensive team and the defense is only getting better!
Time to get over .500 baby!
Get ready to light the beam!
Slamson or Kayte? I cant tell.
Not one run-on sentence, has to be Slamson.
There’s no way these bums from Brooklyn travel all the way to Sacramento and beat us. Tonight the Nets will be sent packing, and just be another victim of the surging Kings.
Band aids, laser beams, and Brown’s quick time outs … oh my.
Let’s do this!
Kaiser passing out 5k Band-Aids at tonight’s game. LMAO
TIN FOIL CAT:
Kyrie is part of a secret society of free-thinking individuals who worship at the temple of Y’u Toub. It is there where he learned how the flat world really operates, unbeknownst to sheep. (Sheep are just animals, afterall, who don’t even know how to cut their own hair).
Everything Kyrie has done up to this point…making himself a pain in the ass so teams would trade him…forgoing vaccines…spreading hurtful videos…resulting in suspensions….everything was done so that he could evade today’s game against the Sacramento Kings and their
JEWISH SPACE LASER
How did you manage to steal Ziller’s cat for a photo op? Usually the 5G makes his “thinking cap” spark and sizzle and he’s completely impossible to work with after that…
I had to pay him 5 G’s
Was that in Ziller bucks?
Yes, though he asked to convert it through a combination of some sort of crypto currency as well as buying gift cards at Best Buy and phoning in the account numbers
So you’re telling me that the Kings have graduated from tire fires to forest fires?
Is QAnon going to sue you for your use of the term “jewish space laser”?
I have a Quincy Acy power balance bracelet that protects me from that
Badge Legend