A couple weeks ago, you could look at preseason two ways:

"We'll be able to see what these young bucks have got without the mortal tethers of needing to win every game. Donté Green for 30 minutes? Yes please! Bobby Brown running the offense? Yes please!"

… or …

"No one woulda thunk the Kings could win 38 games last year. No one thinks the Kings will win 38 games this year. Kevin Martin, John Salmons, Beno Udrih: show me somethin' good."

I neglected to account for this third, bitter possibility:

"Our defense will look historically bad. Everyone but Kevin Martin will have terrible stretches. Quincy Douby will miss the whole shebang, Shelden Williams will fall behind Kenny Thomas on the depth chart. Spencer Hawes will look alright in total but will get completely and totally destroyed by Greg Oden … twice. The kids will show more weakness than electricity. Beno Udrih won't play the last week. Francisco Garcia will strain his calf and miss at least the first week of the regular season. Reggie Theus will not grow a mustache."

That's the reality, folks. Cheers.

Merciful end, thou art upon us. Free us from this exhibition prison without further injury or embarrassment.

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