Down with Brian Cardinal.

The Custodian ended up paying the price last week when Congressman Brad Miller went ballistic on the Grizzez, single-handedly destroying Bobby Jackson's return to ARCO.

Cardinal's crime was playing dirty and slapping his former Fort Wayne friend's fractured finger. (Alliteration is my bitch.) A 2001 vintage of Bee-rad Estates vino promptly scored eight straight points to clinch the well-fought victory. All was grand…

…until tonight. Because you know a thug-lifer like Brian F'n Cardinal ain't backing down from the very street B-52. MB10 and Tru Warier, along with noted hooligans Flight #23 and K-9, may have to step in to regulate on ghettofied personalities like Pau Gasol, Shane Battier and Mike Miller. A gang war for the ages is in the making, really.

Send the children to bed early, folks. This could escalate quickly.

Warning in tow, to the lineups!

MEMPHIS
PG – Chucky Atkins, undeserved starter.
SG – Eddie Jones, underappreciated gunner.
SF – Shane Battier, dookie. (Oh, it's "Dukie?" My bad.)
PF – Pau Gasol, who should really change the spelling of his name to "Pow." More fierce.
C  – Brian Cardinal? It's on, b*tch.

SACTOWN
PG – The Bibbilicious Bibbinator, Myyyyyke Biiiiiibbeeeeee.
SG – Flight #23, the unstoppable (sometimes) Kevin Dallas Martin Jr.
SF – The Savior. (Holy crap, I just called a guy who took a part-time job at Circuit City weeks after being drafted #16 overall "the savior." Umm…)
PF – Kenneth Cornelius Thomas, the Tim Duncan of sour-faced, scowling, chemistry-be-damned power forwards.
C  – Brad Miller, player-hater hater.

The line: +6.5. Tough call. I think the under on the 180 O/U line is a better bet.

Fun bet o' the night: "Pow" Gasol dunks? +/- 7.

Sideshow most likely to be entertaining: Bibby vs. Bobby, part trois. BoJax got the better end last time, though MB10 got the W.

Best matchup: Pow/Lorenzen/Cardinal vs. Bee-rad/K-9/Shareef. Will Adelman let Artest move up to cover Gasol? It'd be an interesting decision. If nothing else, it would restrict Pow's driving ability, though he could shoot over the top.

Goal tracker update: The Kings are four games under .500.

Let's go Kings! Get to the break in style! (And don't get any arms lobbed off.)