If you'd thought the Maloofs couldn't get any worse, Sacramento Kings fans are now being dragged into Adrienne "The Girl Maloof" Maloof's divorce from Dr. Paul Nassif. Adrienne, who you may know from that episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills shot partially at what everyone thought would be the last Sacramento Kings game ever in April 2011, an episode which included Adrienne being ridiculously anxious about the threat of physical violence from angry Kings fans even though not even the most tenuous proof of any such threat has been presented and even though, frankly, just about no one in Sacramento cares about Adrienne Maloof or her show … where was I? Oh yes, Adrienne (the sister of George, Joe, Gavin and Silent Phil) had previously alleged that Nassif carried a firearm throughout their nine-year marriage.

TMZ reports that Nassif's excuse for packing heat is that …

Ahem.

1. There has never been a report of any single legit threat made to any of the Maloofs. Ever. Not within the past year. Certainly not nine years ago. (Chris Webber's knee exploded nine years ago, by the way.)

2. The relocation rumors have been heavy for 18 months. But go ahead and cite a phantom threat from crazed Kings fans for the past nine years, buddy.

3. "Large fortune?"

4. Can anyone even pick out which of these fellas is Dr. Paul Nassif?

I rest my case.