Possibly the single craziest work week of my entire life. I mean, holy crap. I haven't even been able to read Deadspin this week. OK, that's a lie. I got to read it Thursday afternoon, when I knew Clinton Portis' press conference was a-comin'.

So what's all this whiny-bitch-work-stuff mean to you? It means….to the lineups!

LOS ANGELES
PG – Sam Cassell Is An Alien
SG – Cuttino Mobley Is A Fan Of Stevie Francis
SF – Corey Maggette Is Eternally Injured
PF – Elton Brand Is A Freak Of Nature
C  – Chris Kaman Is A Freak

SACTOWN
PG – Get Yoked or Lose All of Your Basketball Skills Tryin'
SG – The Fresh Prince of Land Park
SF – Punky Brewster
PF – The Kenneth Cornelius Show
C  – The Congressman

The line: +2. Sounds reasonable. The over/under is 201; the under might be worth looking at.

Fun bet o' the night: Periods of loud booing. I'll take two.

Sideshow most likely to be entertaining: Shaun Livingston. Would anyone be surprised if absolutely anything happened in this guy's career? I'm sure the expectation level is high in Clipperland (if there is such a place), but really. If this guy played another three injury-plagued seasons before getting on the Ron Mercer Express to invisibility, I wouldn't be that shocked. If he wins an MVP in five years, I wouldn't be terribly shocked. It's all kind of up in the air. Also, both starting fives are essentially made up of two power fowards and three shooting guards. Worth mentioning.

Best matchup: Daniel Ewing vs. Peja Stojakovic. If Peja can't throw up 25+ against a rook, he's not our guy. If Petrie re-signs him, I'll hurl.

Just go watch the damn game already. Go Kings!